Are you trying to convince us, or yourself that though you’re “pan” you’ll keep that part of you locked and shut off because you’re with someone who fits one of many molds you identify with?
I don’t keep this part of myself locked and shut off. I write about it, I talk about it, I go to Pride, I fantasize about whatever and whoever I want.
I can be attracted to people of all genders/sexes without having to fuck all those people, just as straight women can be attracted to multiple men without needing to fuck all of them.
I get that my perspective isn’t what you’re used to, but please don’t assume you know more about my feelings/needs/marriage than I do.