I’m sorry you’ve had people in your life who reacted that way to your emotions. Clearly, there’s a societal problem in raising boys to always act tough (feminists are working to change this!) but there are so many of us women who want so much for men to be able to access and express their emotions.

My brother is a club promoter who was in a frat, and he always talks about people like, “You can’t trust anybody.” He has a completely different conception of people than I do, and it’s from the scene he’s in. It does make a big difference who we surround ourselves with, for what parts of ourselves we feel comfortable sharing.

Anyway, I wish my husband cried more than he does. He and I are both aware that he has a hard time crying because of his childhood socialization, so I feel so glad when he’s able to cry.