It’s definitely a complicated issue, and I have chosen not to do it unless my husband changes his mind about it.

But I don’t know where you got the info that veganism is bad for pregnancies. Animal agriculture puts a ton of money into telling everyone they need to eat animal products, but it’s just not the case.

Anecdotally, I had a flawlessly healthy vegan pregnancy and have lots of vegan friends who did the same. But we don’t need to concentrate on anecdotes:

“It is the position of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics that appropriately planned vegetarian, including vegan, diets are healthful, nutritionally adequate, and may provide health benefits for the prevention and treatment of certain diseases. These diets are appropriate for all stages of the life cycle, including pregnancy, lactation, infancy, childhood, adolescence, older adulthood, and for athletes.” https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/27886704

“Vegan pregnant women have a lower-than-average rate of cesarean delivery, less postpartum depression, and lower neonatal and maternal mortality, with no complications or negative outcomes that are higher than average. Generally, vegans weigh less than omnivores and seem to experience fewer weight-related complications, and plant-based maternal diets could prevent gestational diabetes by providing greater amounts of fiber. In addition, the incidence of preeclampsia appears to be lower among vegan mothers.” https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4561836/

And being paid was not at all the issue to him. Money is a huge stress right now; that money would be incredible for our family. He would be okay with either of us doing so many things for that kind of money, but this one, he just freaks out about and hasn’t been able to seriously consider. Like I said, I’m respecting that, but I don’t need to feel okay about it.

I really appreciate that he got a vasectomy, after 15 years of birth control falling on me. We’re doing pretty good right now, but it’s a tough issue.