Thanks for writing this! I dated someone who was VERY pushy about this and wanted to keep keep keep trying, so many times, despite me crying and saying how uncomfortable I was, physically and emotionally. He told me I just wasn’t relaxing enough, and continually compared me to other women (exes, porn stars), telling me “women like it once they relax enough,” as if he was doing it for me. People so rarely talk about this, so I’ve barely talked to anyone about it. So, seriously, thank you.

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Empathy for the win! Published in Gen, Human Parts, Heated, Tenderly —Feminism, Sexuality, Veganism, Anti-Racism, Parenting. She/They darcyreeder.substack.com

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