Ugh. All of these!

Just before reading this, I went in the bathroom to grab some vitamin D for both me and my husband — because he doesn’t remember to take it unless I (buy it and then) hand it to him — and I noticed a used Q-Tip of his on the bathroom floor. As I was picking up his bent, yellowed Q-Tip, I thought to myself, “Are you my fucking teenage son? What is this shit?” and then your piece was suggested to me on my phone.

I didn’t even complain to him. I just smiled and handed him the vitamin D.